“Operation Tangled Web”

 

“Operation Tangled Web”

I have confronted the evil masses within my walls with decisive force and bold determination. They had invaded my privacy and taken over my house. NO MORE!

First was the visit to the grocery shop to buy the best there was and then home to deal with the delinquents!!

I used that can of spray to deal with the main issue – the office ceiling and corners, the office windows, and doors and outside the office. Then came the main bedroom, kitchen and lounge… and yet I found none in the children’s bedrooms (huh!)

They all came scurrying out of their webs to face extinction and certain death and I bravely held my breath as the fumes and their glares threatened to rob me of life.

Then they started to fall…to the ground…at my feet!!! I held back the screams as I backed out of the rooms – to request my eldest son to deal with the dead bodies with the vacuum cleaner.

With trepidation, I dealt with their homes, babies and food sources which spoiled my home and peace. I pulled out windows and screens and sprayed more of the little blighters that were hiding like secret agents waiting for their not so clever comrades to fall. Then with unquestionable courage I finished off those that tried to flee.

Armed with wash clothes, warm soapy water, a bit of elbow grease and resolve I cleaned and scrubbed all evidence of their existence from every area. Finally I washed the curtains which hid them and resealed the curtain rod ends.

“Operation Tangled Web” was finished and it found a more peaceful and happier me. Now… back to my writing….

 

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I dislike spiders!!!

I don’t hate them… I just don’t like them in my house.

Also, I don’t like them in them in my garden, or on the patio, or in the car or in the garage, or in my bike helmet… or shoes. Ok, I really REALLY don’t like spiders, ANYWHERE!

I don’t think I fear them. They are just…well…creepy!

They have this thing where they take over. They take over the inside of our house, they take over the outside of the house. They just TAKE OVER! They crawl out of their hiding place to reveal themselves at the worst possible times. Like when I move the curtain, or when I pick up a book. Or they drop down in front of me while I am working on my computer. Why do they do that?

So in our house we have the “Daddy long-leg” and the “Black House” spider. Icky!! Then there is the occasional Huntsman, who because of his size could take over a whole bedroom. Ewwwww!!

Odd occasionally we seem to get almost a plague of them very suddenly and only the most throughout clean will get rid of them. And, since my friends and family know my dislike for spiders, I have many who have come forward to admit that they too are not happy with this particular creation of God. Probably along with flies, mosquitoes, midgets and any other creepy crawly.

As I mentioned before, we have in our country the Huntsman spider and here is a little blurb from the internet about this spider…

“Huntsman spiders of many species sometimes enter houses. They are also notorious for entering cars, and being found hiding behind sun visors or running across the dashboard.”

Yeah… so… do you get what I mean? There is nothing… and I repeat nothing… worse for a person like myself to be happily driving along, singing praises to God and then something appears on your dashboard or windscreen…you know.. the size of a desert bowl!! (ok, slightly smaller than that) That “something” is the maker of bad dreams, the disturber of my peace, and will make me a certain maniac as I try to deal with the possibility of his nearness actually touching my person.

My children, I am happy to announce, do not like spiders either. Not that they would admit that.

One day my eldest was joking with me about a spider that was clinging for life on the outside of our car windscreen as we drove to church. It was on the out there, so I wasn’t too worried..right? My youngest was touching my arm, pretending to be the creepy spider. They were both laughing at their mother’s discomfort. BIG BRAVE BOYS!!!

All of a sudden the spider ran along the window and disappeared from view. The boys were joking but checking everywhere around THEM, while I kept my eyes on the road. Suddenly I shouted, “THERE it is!!” and pointed to the windscreen in front of my eldest.

He nearly jumped into my lap!! Both my boys had eyes the size of saucers and it took them a few minutes to realise that I was just kidding with them. Yep, big brave children!

 

The God touch

 

As usual, I find that God speaks to me about simple things that happen in my life to show me that His search of my heart and life are gently causing change and a thoughtfulness of God in that life.

Spiders remind me of things that clutter and cause discomfort to ourselves and to others around us. Spiders also teach me that we can squeal and poke fun at others sin and problems, but when we have problems we expect mercy not condemnation.

Bad attitudes, sin, bad habits…you know… stuff that we shouldn’t have in our lives, but do. They are the things that creep up on us and all of a sudden take over our lives. Indication of their existence are evident in what they catch…more bad habits, sin and bad attitudes.

Attitude come slowly until one day they drop down or turn up in front of us and we wonder what happened. In fact, some would say that a bad attitude can shock us, frighten us and catch us unawares… a bit like the spiders in my house or car. It is what we do with them that makes the difference.

Now let me say about something else. Sin. There I said it. Now before you run screaming at the thoughts of other’s sin, I am talking about our personal sin. The things that separate us in our relationship with God. Note that I did not say that is separates us from God. No. It breaks our close and intimate relationship with God. Easy… deal with it… just like you would deal with any pest in your home. Get the little blighters out of your life and deal with “the sin that so easily entangles’. (Hebrews 12:1) Oh, and btw… if you have any experience with spider webs you know what Paul is saying.

You know, habits are the same. Deal with them if they are causing trouble. Just deal with it.

And here is the really, really important bit. Ask God to help you, and believe. (Mark 11:24)

‘Cause it is only the touch of God that can show up those little blighters and help you clean them away.

God has the gentlest of touch. He doesn’t condemn, only give us the desire to give up the things that will destroy our live and our eternity with Him. But conviction of sin is real. We should dislike our sin. We should want our house (ourselves) clean. He has already provided the cleaner and fumigator (repentance and forgiveness) and he has provided all-round the year pest control (the Word of God and the Holy Spirit).

Why are we happy with the pests and the unhappiness it brings? Is it because that seems better?

Take some time to talk to God today. Spiders are not fun.

 

 

 

 

 

Stand Up, Speak Out and Act – Say no to violence

 

(Domestic Violence is an issue very close to my heart. Tomorrow (the 25th November) is White Ribbon Day. It is a day where men encourage other men to not be violent, and not be silent about abuse that happens around them. It is about encouraging men to Stand Up, Speak Out and Act.)

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Thirty years ago, I hung on to the handle of a car and prayed for my safety.

My boyfriend at the time, was a ‘petrolhead’, who loved fast cars and fast relationships. He was, at the time of my terror, driving his hotted-up car at full tilt up a windy narrow road to the top of a mountain. It was well after 9PM, and, most of the time, the car we were in went sideways around the corners and really didn’t straighten up to go around the next corner. The screams in my mind did not reach my lips and not a sound came out of my mouth. With his eyes on the road, he hooted and then switched off his lights and yelled over the noise of the car engine, “Don’t worry, I do this so that I know who is coming down the mountain. They will have their lights on and I can see if they are about to come around the corner.”

Despite the fact that that young man could have taken my life that night, and possibly the life of another person coming the other way. I never stood up for myself, or others and told him what I thought of the situation in which I had found myself.

When we got to the top, I should have stepped out of the vehicle and called a friend to pick me up. But no – I stayed in the car, the relationship and the fast lifestyle until he dumped me for another woman.

A year later, I entered another relationship, and for the next fourteen years went on the next wild ride – one that included physical, mental, emotional, and sexual abuse. I hung on for dear life and prayed for safety, respect, and love to be mine. The screams of heartbreak and terror reached my mind but never my lips. The bruises faded and my heart broke while silent tears slipped silently down my face. On odd occasions, I would speak, but then be terrified that my husband would know of the ‘betrayal’ I would bring to our lives.

Despite the ‘ride’, I stayed hanging on for grim death to the handles of my failing marriage and ignoring the damage I could do to myself (and later, my young child and the unborn baby in my tummy) and did not move to change the situation I was in.

I was too scared, too unsure of myself and too certain that it was because I was to blame. The same voice of uncertainty that thought that I was silly to make a fuss over a fast ride was the same voice that told me I was to blame for my husband’s anger.

The home I had grown up in was the same that I was in now. Yes, I was not a good wife. I was just like my mum – disobedient, rebellious, stupid, and unable to be of any use to anyone… or so I thought.

My strength, I believed, was in being a hard worker; strong in muscle and able to do any task set before me. Even if it meant working like a man. I was proud that I was independent and strong. The conflict of what I thought I was, was too difficult for me to see and the pretence too hard to live up to.

The inability to stand up for myself at home, started clashing with the job I had at the time. As a Security Guard, the assertiveness I was learning did nothing to change what was happening at home. The front I held onto as a good, religiously faithful wife, as a Salvation Army soldier and a no nonsense Security Officer, became a non-identity in the relationship with my husband. It slipped away to nothing as I stepped into my own home, silently falling like the dirty clothes I took off at the end of the day.

The few friends I had, could do nothing for me as they were sworn to secrecy. Slowly, I allowed the Salvation Army ministers and my doctor to know, but they could not do anything while I silently and passively allowed myself to remain in brokenness and rejected the help they offered.

Silently, I screamed for help and hoped that the bruises or the pain would be noticed and that someone would come to my rescue, while rejecting the people who came my way, regardless.

Silently, I cried myself to sleep and hoped that someone would count the tears on my pillow.

Silently, I covered up for my husband’s outbursts in public and covered the marks that hid his private outbursts.

Silently, I blocked anyone from seeing what he was like, as if it was my fault anyway.

Men who knew, said nothing as they watched, not knowing what to do without causing me more pain. No-one knew how to fix my private pain.

One day, I backed away from his swing, then caught the eyes of my toddler son whose face mirrored my terror.  His mouth was open in a scream – but silent…just like mine years ago. I ran over to him, picked him up and carried him into the room and locked the door. The baby in my tummy stopped moving and silently I prayed that he was okay.

From that day forward, I took steps to never be silent again.

I challenged the views I had of myself, I fought for my safety and I spoke to others of the hidden life beyond my public persona.

I fought the lies that were told to the world. I was not bi-polar, I was not emotionally stable. I did not have multiple personalities or post-natal depression. I was not a stupid person, who was clumsy and difficult.

I was me… and the me that I was getting to know was better than the ‘me’ he said I was.

People who are in abusive relationships need help, but they are seemingly unaware that they are not to blame, that there is a way out, and that they can get help. The world they reside in, and the conflict within the relationship, are emotionally and mentally overwhelming.

The education to know about and to avoid such relationships was not available to me as a young woman. The help for women like myself, was not talked about. Domestic violence was not openly spoken about in my circle of friends and acquaintances.

And the community support was not readily available should I need to move out of our home quickly.

There was one other thing greater than all this.

I, myself, did not think I was worthy of the respect, worthy of better treatment, so I went into the relationship and I stayed.

I remained the victim, until I chose to be a survivor.

Saying ‘No’ to violence starts within the hearts of average Australians – every person. Every man, every woman, and every child. Everyone is worth something to someone. Saying ‘No’ is the start, acting and speaking is the next start.

No voice should be silent and every voice heard.

 

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Womens helpline –  1800 811 811

Womensline

 

 

Hope

 

(This is an excerpt from my book “He Whispers Our Name”. It is written directly after I give my testimony of how God brought me through the darkest time of my life – a time of dispair and hopelessness. It was during this time that He allowed me to see that the hope that I thought I had, was not hope at all. This portion of the book is called, “Hope that is not hope” and it is the chapter that is titled, “Hope”. The Holy Spirit has instructed me to share this with someone today. I am praying for you. I do not have to know your name, God does.)

 

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Hope that is not hope

By going through this time I realized that I had placed my hope in something very different to what God intended. By doing things my own way I felt captive and restless. In not believing God’s Word and promises to me and trusting Him fully I was not seeing, not hearing and not understanding. Let me explain..

My confidence was in the future that I saw, doing my own thing. If my day was bad, or my husband didn’t love me, or my children got hurt, then God wasn’t there … and why wasn’t He there? Well then, I would be okay. I had me. I was strong and I could do anything.

My hope was in the possibility that God would hear and rescue me. I used to pray prayers for surviving the car drive or the next night shift at work. I was always afraid that I might not survive the next day or the future. Had I have prayed enough, been a good enough girl? Had I said all that I needed in the prayer to cover all that God needed to do to protect my life?

My trust was in my own strength and abilities. True I trusted God to be there. He was going to be there, wasn’t He? I knew that God had promised protection and promised to be there. But would He do that for me?

I hoped that tomorrow would be a better day. I hoped that I would have my health in the future. I hoped that the money would come through. I hoped that my sons would be well and healthy … I hoped.

The hope that I have just spoken of is only a possibility, like a huge mathematical equation filled with ifs and buts, full of “maybe’s” and “could be’s”. Is this truly the hope that God gives? No.

The question I eventually asked myself was – did I truly trust God who was my hope for the future as well as now. Was I certain of the truthfulness of God?

 

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A copy of my book can be obtained from

– www.ruthlindsay.com.au

or in Ebook form –

www.amazon.com/ruthlindsay

Strong? Really???

 

 

 

A few nights ago, I was about to put my head on the pillow to go to sleep and God spoke,  “I have made you strong.”

I was very tired after a long day. I felt bone weary and was looking forward to going to sleep. I knew that in 7 hours the alarm would go off for my husband to go to work, and I would be awake, dressed, getting him a cuppa, preparing his lunch and ready to start the day. It is also, at this time of the morning, that I have my time with God.

Now, if I were asking God a question about the subject of strength, I would question my own hearing, so my Father often catches me by surprise when He needs to say something important.

The words came strong enough for me to know that the thoughts were not mine, my spirit quickened and I was instantly wide awake.

“I have made you strong.”

“What!!!!????”

Silence.

“What do you mean, Father?”

Silence. I felt His love for me, but He had nothing more to say.

Mmmm…okay. I shook my head and waited, thoughts swirling through my head. So, I do what I always do when I don’t understand. I prayed.

“Father, I know you have brought me to this point and I know that you have done this. You never say anything to me unless you need me to know more, or to understand something that I don’t understand. So, Father, I will wait. Thank you for these words…”

My heart trailed off into thoughts, a touch excited. I love my Father speaking to me. I love to hear His voice.

As I drifted off to sleep, I was trying to work out whether He said, “I have made you strong” or “I have made you strong” or “I have made you strong” or “I have made you strong”. I finally figured out that He didn’t emphasis any of it, because all of it was God anyway!!

The next morning, I poured over scripture, but mainly the one that popped into my head as I drifted off to sleep the night before. Isaiah 9. And it was verse 7 (the end of verse 7) that caught my eye.

“… The zeal of the Lord Almighty will accomplish this.”

God’s zeal will accomplish this. If I could just get my head around this….

God will do everything in this world, for His kingdom and in our lives. Not because of us, not because of our prayers, and not because I want it. But because He is zealously accomplishing it. (yes, I am pretty sure I am not supposed to use those words like that)

He…God…is zealous in accomplishing what He needs to do. Got it?

Ok, so for me that put a lot of things in perspective and I think I just got a glimpse of the awesomeness of God.

God as made me/you strong, not for our sake, but because He is going to accomplish things in the world that He needs. He will make each one of us strong in different way and different times and for different things, because He is going to accomplish it. FULL STOP.

Oh and by the way.. it did me good to once again look up the Hebrew word “zeal” in that passage. Wow, what a passionate word!

Anyway… it occurred to me a few days later, that God will do in my life what is needed. I have given my life to Him. I am His child, His daughter…His. God will accomplish, not because I am so great, or that He demands it. But because He is pleased to give us the opportunity to love Him back.

So…

You ( the person who is reading this)..yes YOU. What has God given you the opportunity to do?

OOOOOhhhhh… you think you can’t?

Mmm.. let us go back to the “zeal” thing again. It is not up to me to have the strength, the qualifications, the abilities or even the place and time. It is God. It has always been God.

Don’t worry, I haven’t got it all yet either. But here is a scripture to ponder.

It is God who arms me with strength and keeps my way secure.

He trains my hands for battle;  my arms can bend a bow of bronze.

(Psalm 18:32 and 34) NIV

 

Be blessed as you read His Word.

Moon and the Son

Last night we were treated to a beautiful sight of the moon. A “Supermoon” was what they called it. My eldest son and I love to take photos so we went out to see what we could capture on our cameras. (above is a picture I took)

Along with it came the inevitable – a question from my curious offspring – “What is a “supermoon?” Well, being that I was just interested in what it looked like and not what it was, I had to admit that I didn’t have a clue. So I went to ask “Mr Google”. (yes I regularly ask Goggle questions to answer my inquisitive children)

One article described it like this – “A supermoon is a new or full moon closely coinciding with perigee – the moon’s closest point to Earth in its monthly orbit.” It further went on to say this – “The full moon on November 14, 2016, will present the closest supermoon of the year (356,509 kilometers or 221,524 miles). What’s more, this November 14, 2016 full moon will showcase the moon at its closest point to Earth thus far in the 21st century (2001 to 2100), and the moon won’t come this close again until the full moon of November 25, 2034. “.  (1)

I love Google.. sometimes!! I also love that my children challenge me not to become too stale in what I know and what I think.

God often uses these times to teach me something new.

 

Keep learning

 

People often challenge me to keep searching out the Word of God. You see… I didn’t know everything. Surprised? Sometimes it is like I know very little. It causes me to run to the bible and my Strong’s Concordance to find out what the Word of God says. Because when I don’t know, I want to know.

When I hear scripture misquoted. When I hear scripture quoted that I have never heard before. When I hear scripture quoted out of a context that I would normally hear it. When I sense that God wants me to look up His Word…or when I suddenly want to know more. These are the reasons I find myself searching scriptures.

Curiosity is a good thing. Questions should be asked. Admitting that we don’t know everything is a fantastic thing, it keeps us from being a “know-it-all”.

I still remember when one of my children just started school. It was the first week of his schooling. I heard him talking to his little friend in the lounge room and I came a little closer, but just out of sight, to listen.

Son: “I know lots and lots of stuff”

Friend: “yeah me too, I know lots too”

My son leaned closer to his friend and with a knowing look of superior wisdom said, “I think I know more than mum!” To which they both agreed and went on colouring in. To this day I do the same thing when I remember… I smile.

No matter how old you are, we should never believe that we know a lot of “stuff”. I clearly remember that in Nazarene Theological College, our very elderly bible teacher would often walk in the room and ask, with a twinkle in his eye, “Guess what I learnt today?” Since he was as old as the hills (we thought) and that we were so smart (we figured), it always took us by surprise that he needed to learn more (shock).

The older I get, the more I realise I know very little. Especially about my God.

 

The Son

 

In looking at the moon and later at the pictures I took I was reminded once again at the mercy and love of my God. I have been struggling with not doing enough in my service to God. I want so much to serve Him. Sometimes it wants to burst from me. But I want to do it His way only.

I writing this as God is speaking to my heart and reminding me that I just need to do what He wants… that is – have Him shine on me.

This beautiful moon is always there. Every night it is in our night sky. We are not always seen by others, and sometimes the cloud covers us over. It is only when the sun shines upon it that it is seen. Once and a while there is a moon eclipse where the moon is blacked out… and everybody know about that because it happens rarely.

Now I am no scientist, nor do I pretend to know anything about moon, sun or earth, but God used this opportunity to speak to me.

As a Christian, given totally to my God I am already there. Seen before I was born and loved by Him. I have answered His call and I am there, whether people see me or not.

In my younger life, I seem to not have God in my life and many saw this. I was a shadow of what I should be, but He knew I was there. All I needed, was to allow what had come between me and the Son to pass by, and I shone again.

A few years ago, some people saw me fail in a small area of my life. They have no clue why I was hurting and hiding away, but they took pictures in their mind and still to this day assess me on the fact that I didn’t “shine”. They fail to see that I am only a moon. God needs them to see that. I can’t be the bright one, I am not supposed to be. There are times when my flaws are going to be seen, and I am glad they did. Now I can go on with them knowing that I have clay feet and do what God wants anyway.

My life shines in the dark whether people acknowledge it or not. When I pass close to the lives of others and shine bright with the Son, I am noticed the most. Not because I am anything, but because the Son is everything.

So here I am. I will, by the grace of God, continue to be everything God wants me to be and allowing Him to shine on me. In my home… in my street… in my town… and in my country.

And remember… when we are not there to shine on people during the night, is when they look for us the most until the Son shines on them in a new day.

 

Be blessed

 

Ruth

(1) http://earthsky.org/space/what-is-a-supermoon

 

The roads we travel.

 

 

 

“Set up signposts to mark your trip home. Get a good map. Study the road conditions. The road out is the road back. Come back, … come back to your hometowns. How long will you flit here and there, indecisive? How long before you make up your fickle mind? God will create a new thing in this land: A transformed woman will embrace the transforming God!” Jeremiah 31:21 MSG

 

Every year between March and September I am on official duty as a footy mum.

This year my sons played their first year in NRL (Rugby League). Just to make things a little more interesting they not only played club football for their home town, but Representative football for the district as well.

While the boys are battling out against other children of their different age groups, I sit on the sideline and watch nervously… or excitedly. There are times when I hold my breath and wait for them to stand back up after hitting the ground or, another child too hard.

A few weeks ago, we were returning home from one such footy trip, with both boys in the car with me. The 4+ hours to drive home was long and the final stages of the drive I was tired and the boys were over sitting in the car. While there was no fighting, it certainly wasn’t too far from the surface and I was glad to turn into our street and driveway.

As a family living in country Queensland Australia, we do a lot of travelling. Most years, we travel around 30 – 40,000 kilometres per year. The roads in all the different directions are varied and require different types of driving.

It was during the last stages of the drive that I found myself pondering… my life was very like the different road trips I do.

 

There are the smooth straight roads

 

This is the main road heading towards the larger towns and cities where we go to some of the footy games, to doctor’s appointments and shopping for items not found in our small country town. Most of it is driven at 100km/hr except for passing through the tiny townships that you would miss if you blinked. The road is, for the most part, very straight.

This road is easy driving, smooth and uncomplicated. It requires very little activity of the brain and while this is easy it is also dangerous. While I am fresh and driving, it will cause very little trouble other than keeping a close eye on other drivers and the speed of my vehicle. But when I am tired, requires me to stay alert and take regular stops to ensure the safety of everyone on board.

Sometimes the road I travel is smooth going, it can cause me to become complacent and not be as alert as I need to be. It only takes a small lack of concentration to drift off course. It only takes another driver lack of sense to endanger my life. And it only takes the sun to be in your eyes for you to fall asleep quickly…

I find that I need to keep an eye on myself to see how alert I am staying with my life. As a Christian it is easy to drift. The world around me can endanger me, while my own attitudes and emotions can run me off the road (or off track).  I can fall asleep if I don’t realise how I am going, and actively do something about it.

 

There are the rough country roads

 

These are the roads that are bumpy and need you to drive the vehicle at the speeds suited for the vehicle you drive and your driving ability. The wildlife is the biggest threat as well as too much confidence and lack of experience.

Kangaroos often sit in the grass and as you approach their position, they jump out in front of your moving vehicle and attempt to get to the other side of the road. This requires you slow as you see them and sometimes be prepared to use the brakes if they continue in their chosen pathway in front of you.

Country roads have surprises like potholes, corrugation and rain-washed channels. All of this requires you keep your full concentration and your eyes looking forward and each side of the road.

Night-time is the worst time to drive. Danger sits in the shadows on the side of the road as the wildlife are no longer easily seen, while in front of you – somewhere in the murky dimness are the potholes – that were somewhat easier to see in daylight.

My experience as a Christian that our walk here on earth is very like this type of road. Experience is not necessarily going to be an advantage to you with what jumps into your way. The night-time of our lives is often harder as we are unable to see what is ahead. There is no coincident that God the Word of God say that He is “a lamp unto our feet and a light unto our path”. There is also no coincident that He says that he is “a very present help in times of trouble”.

We don’t know what we are about to face or what is up ahead. Even if we have travelled the road many times before, there is no guarantee that it will still be the same this time. God is not only with us in the car, but He has driven it before us, and goes behind us as well. Our past, our now, our future is known and we have nothing to fear.

 

I ride alone

 

I ride a motorbike.  The children at school that I teach religious instruction to, tease me that my bike is a “peewee 50”. I presume that they think that it is not big enough and powerful enough. My bike is a Cruiser… whatever that means! And for those that wish to tell me – I am really, really not interested. Oh BTW.. it is blood red in colour.

I find riding a motorbike to be an “interesting” thing to do. I don’t particularly enjoy it. I ride because I want to keep my ability to do so, and because I have not decided yet that I will sell it. I don’t like feeling the wind, I am not adventurous, and I miss my music. But… I don’t mind the challenge.

Sometimes I do things because it stops me from settling into a rut of “the usual” and it is a little bit different to what I normally do. Being that I am not an adventurous person, I sometimes need to step out of my comfort zone, even if I don’t like it.

It is also very lonely thing to do.

I don’t like times of being alone… accept with God, times when I choose to be alone with Him. But I don’t like it when I feel like I am going through something alone. I would rather have people around me, but that it not always possible. But when I am alone, I am always aware that God is not far away.

I am grateful, that my choice of vehicle that I ride is exactly that. It is my my choice. I can choose whether I ride a motorbike or a car, bus, train or airplane. Not so in my daily journey on this earth. Often those choices are made for me, often by circumstances beyond my control. It is how I cope with that journey that make the difference. Do I see it as a joy and a privilege or a complete drag? Do I see it as a growing experience or not?

 

Loud or not allowed?

 

When I travel with my children, the music in the car is very VERY loud. The car vibrates and I am sure that you can hear our car coming before you see it. Because we drive in the country, there is only the wildlife and the odd occasional town to bother with the sound. I make the children turn down the music before we get to the town and while we drive through the town… then it goes up again.

Driving with my husband is the opposite. We listen to very little music. He likes podcasts, sermons and music on as background. I feel my children’s eyes roll as they look at me. He will not allow loud music, and they are annoyed.

When I drive in the car by myself I can do as I wish. Sometimes I listen to loud music or I might listen to podcasts and sermons, and if I feel like it I have quiet reflections and time with God.

Living with others require that you “put up” with the things that they like and dislike. Often people clash by the differences that they have. Not one of us are the same. My children are not the same as each other, they are not like their step-dad. Teaching my children to negotiate with each other is necessary. Teaching them to respect others is also important.

I have people who are attached to my life that cause my road to be very rough indeed. They travel with me. For you it could be a family member, a church member, a community member. Sometimes people are a bit like hitchhikers, only travel with a for a short time. Others are with us for the duration of our life. Some people bring with us very loud music, or no music at all… or music we don’t like. Do you get my point?

God expects His children to get along, whether something is loud or not allowed. He expects us to respect those in authority over us. We do not travel our road by ourselves, and even if we do seem to be alone, we still must be thoughtful of those whose lives we touch.

 

Return home

 

There is no feeling like the feeling of returning to your own home. Really there is no feeling like when we turn to God. I don’t think I have to expand on this. Just turn to God. Turn the wheel of your heart towards Him.

 

Ride with the One and Only

Whatever road you are on, whatever your choice of ride (or lack of choice), or whoever you ride with… the most important factor is the One who ride with us?

I often look at my chaotic, “non-trouble-free” life and wonder what it would be like.I wonder what it would be like to have smooth roads to be on.

Other times I say to myself “strap yourself in, it is going to be a wild ride” and all the while the One I strap myself to, is God.

 

“Thank you Father for the rides, I am hanging on to you. May I always have the courage to continue, accepting each and every ride…and every road, and look to You for the help for each and every one”

 

Be blessed

Ruth

 

 

Song of Justice

 

My God, my Saviour, my heart cries out to You for the protection You have promised.

When the ground shakes under me, I can find You alone to stand upon.

You are my Rock, my solid foundation.

 

The ground may move, the earth may tremble, but you my God stand firm.

You hold me firm when my faith is weak. You are merciful when I fail You.

You are my Stronghold and my Deliverer.

 

Giants surround me spilling forth their lies. They wait in earnest for me to fall.

They crouch expectantly for me to be overcome by my frailty.

But you, my God, rescue me and set me on my feet.

 

You heard my cry, my Saviour and you brought me forward to be encircled by Your arms.

Judge me fairly according to your mercy, and steadfastly reveal the truth in the courts.

No one is like you my God, You only can I praise.

 

I lift my eyes in earnest, and look to You my God.

My heart resounds with praise, and sings with sure joy.

My God and my King.

 

– © Ruth Lindsay   April 2015

 

I wrote this poem during a time where I cried out to God for intervention over a matter I was going though. Some sections of this poem are not literal – eg. “giants”. For me the giants are the things that seem bigger than big. Sometimes they are people, but mostly they are problems, the unknown, lack of faith, uncertainty or even a lack of wisdom. Sometimes is is gossip and slander.

 

This poem came from the heart and I am sharing this with you. I hope that you will be blessed as I was in writing it.

 

Blessings

 

Ruth

It left a mark.

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This time last year we had two massive hailstorms that went through our small country town. The last one was huge and left most of the trees in our town without leaves, and damaged many houses and cars. People in our town can tell tales of survival.. embellished by time, of course.

I have several plants that sit on the veranda of my house, shaded from the hot sun and strong winds, and a few that sit on the outer part of the veranda. They are the hardier of plants as they are just like the plants in our garden. Two of those plants, recently caught my attention. One is a miniature rose bush and the other a blueberry bush.

Last year my blueberry bush was about to produce another bumper crop of berries and was thick with foliage and fruit. (pictured above)My miniature rose bush was a gift from my wonderful and loving bible study ladies only a week before the storm. Its branches were covered with beautiful flowers in full bloom.

During the last storm, both received a lot of damage and I was concerned that they would survive. The rose bush was a forked stick poking sorrowfully out of the soil, with not a leaf or flower in sight. My blueberry bush was a mess of broken branches, or dangling by a thread. It’s smashed and damaged fruit littered the large pot it sat in.

I carefully pruned both bushes, removing the damaged branches, and cleared the pots of debris. I sighed as I picked up the unripened fruit and felt grief at the loss.

Everywhere around our big native garden was destruction. Every flowered bush was stripped of its leaves and flowers. Every tree had smaller branches broken, while their smashed leaves provided a earie green carpet on the ground. One tree had fallen across the pathway to our garage and was obviously never going to stand again. The birds that usually fill our garden with noise were strangely quiet. Hail lay in piles, freezing our toes while the air was filled with the humidity that comes after a spring storm.

A year later the garden is blooming again. Apart from the one tree that fell, all the others survived and no sign of the storm a year ago can be seen. Once again the sounds of busy and happy birds fill our ears with sound and everything is bursting with life and colour.

It is the blueberry bush and the rose bush that has been the focus of my heart and prayers over the past few week as God continues to speak to me about it.

I was pottering around my garden taking in the sounds and smells of spring, when I came to the two bushes growing on my veranda. Suddenly I realised that the blueberry bush should have buds ready for fruit…some flowers… something to show what type of bush it was. It didn’t. Every other plant in the garden was doing so. Why not my blueberry bush?

I sat on the wooden floor boards beside the bush and looked at it… this is what I saw –

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Leaves had returned and it had not died, but it’s branches showed the signs of were the hail had hit it. Marks covered the branches and holes were gouged into the main trunk. I had pruned it back to the basic branches, but they were badly damaged. Yet it had survived, and was growing healthy leaves. But there wasn’t a flower in sight and no buds of fruit.

The branches of the blueberry touched a spot in my heart and I sat mesmerised by the ugly marks. A question popped into my head and I stood up to see what the answer was to the question – What about the branches of the rose bush?

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The rose bush (picture above)did not have a single mark on its branches. Not one. The foliage, while still a little sparse, was healthy and the flower buds were plenty. The two flowers that were open, were beautiful and almost perfect. The smell –  divine.

My eyes flicked back to the blueberry bush and God placed a thought in my heart. “some people are like these bushes when storms come.” Then He was silent.

Over the last two weeks, the Lord has continued to speak to me about these bushes every time I see them both. God doesn’t always speak everything at once to me, sometimes it is in dribs and drabs. Little moments of clarity and simple thoughts, along with a gentle reminder that healing sometimes comes slowly.

Like my two bushes I have had some giant hailstorms that have hit my life. For those who want to look closely, you will find marks. You will also find foliage and flowers, and fruit. It depends on what you want to look at. Most people want to admire the flowers and the foliage and turn their eyes away from the marks left by the terrible times that would have nearly destroyed me.

God’s daughter come in all shapes and sizes. We are a varied as there are types of trees in this world. If you got us all in a room, you would go, “WOW!”. But look closely at our branches, especially for those of us that have just gone through a hailstorm, and you will find marks, some of them may even be a bit …ugly? Don’t look away, they are signs of storm damage, they are marks of bravery and strength, they are proof of survival.

Along with our shapes and sizes come the type of branches we have. The blueberry bush branches are bigger than the rose. So, when the hail fell, the blueberry bush stood up to the pounding better, but wore the consequences. Just because any of us bare the scares of the storms, doesn’t mean we were more beaten, just that we took more of a pounding.

Here is the final lesson that came from these little bushes. God is always a better gardener than me. Actually… I am not a gardener at all. I have plants. Some survive and some don’t. I am not sure what I do wrong, but some never survive my “tender loving care”. Since my poor little plants look a little lackluster, I presume I need to visit the local nursery and ask some questions.

My God knows me and know what needs to happen. While I don’t really know if I pruned it properly, God knows what need to be pruned from my life to bring about full and beautiful foliage and the best fruit and flowers. While I doubted whether my plants would survive after such a storm, God knew all along that I would survive. God is the perfect gardener and He is always looking for ways to help me grow and survive whatever I go through.

You know what? Don’t worry about the marks. We can’t be self-focused or all we will see is the marks and everything that we are not. A rose bush and a blueberry bush are not concerned about the marks, they are just doing what God made them to do. What about you?

*****

 

“Look at the birds of the air…Are you not much more valuable than they?” Matthew 6:26

“But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” Matthew 6:33-34

 

Be blessed!

Ruth

 

As God has always planned.

plans

 

As God has always planned

 

I felt God melt my hardened heart, as the words seemed so surreal.
My God stood still as I moved closer, drawn by His love so real.

He welcomed me and warmly breathed, on my stiff and frozen frame.
I turned my face up to my Saviour, as the tears freely came.

All my faults became so clear, and my many sins dark indeed.
My Saviour died and bled for me, I now could clearly see.

That all along He sort to change, the darkness into light.
He wouldn’t hold me as a captive, as I thought He might.

He whispered, “You’re forgiven”, as He gave me a new name.
“My child, you are now Beautiful”, as he took all my guilt and shame.

I shook my head in disbelief; I saw nothing new in me.
“You see, My child, you haven’t seen, the changes that I see.”

“It reveals the beauty of a Son warmed heart, and will grow from My sure touch.”
I nodded my head as this sank in, I needed Him so much.

“Have all of me!” shouted my heart, as I realised I could trust.
This Almighty God, loving Saviour, and Holy Spirit so just.

How could I give Him any less, who gives without complaint.
My heart, my life, and my past – my future without restraint.

I know this Father knows me well, better than I know myself.
He knows well what to fix in me, and draws me to Himself.

What is done in my wayward heart, is not the work of my strong arms
But His Spirit guides and directs me, and keeps my soul from harm.

It only takes me to obey, and listen to God my Saviour.
‘Cause He will always work in me, and change my misbehaviour.

He is my loving, compassionate God, forever will I stand
Upon the promises in His word, the way he always planned.

-Ruth Lindsay © 2016